


Beauty Isn't Just Skin Deep

by HowMiseryLovedMe



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Abusive Relationships, Addiction, F/M, Its just a big house of love, Or Is It?, Peridot has autism, Polyamory, Trans Female Character, Trans Male Character
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-20
Updated: 2017-01-28
Packaged: 2018-09-18 17:33:03
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 9,417
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9395831
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HowMiseryLovedMe/pseuds/HowMiseryLovedMe
Summary: Jasper is a trans girl that you take under your wing, and shenanigans ensue. This was originally going to be a one shot, but I ran with it. Enjoy!





	1. Chapter 1

Finally, it's your 21st birthday. Too bad no one is around, so you sit alone at the bar. You hardly even drank anything, you had one sip of a martini before deciding there's too much of an alcohol taste, so you got free soda.  
"Hey beautiful, you wanna dance with me?" A raspy voice says behind you. Fuck, is this another guy? You swear to god if one more- That's not a guy. Definitely not a guy. Who stands before you is a woman with hair straight out of 1986, huge breasts, a cute orange tank top, and white booty shorts.

"Uh, sure, I would..." You get up and go with the woman to the dance floor. A slow song is playing.

"You're all flustered. Ha." The woman pulls you close. She's quite taller than you. "Hope you don't mind a little surprise." The woman chuckles lowly.

"What's that?" You look up at her curiously.

"You'll see." The woman puts her hands on her hips and sways with you.

"You're beautiful. What's your name?"

"Jasper. Yours?"

"(Y/n)." You close your eyes enjoying the warmth between you. The slow song ends and a faster hip hop song comes on. Jasper smirks. Her swaying turns into slow grinding and... Oh. This must be the surprise. And boy did it make you wet.

"Bet you've never been with a trans girl, huh?" Jasper grinds on you possessively.

"No... But I think you're so much hotter now." You admit.

"Heh. Glad you like it." Jasper has a big smile on her face. She's grinding a lot harder now, getting into the song. You grind right back, making her moan. You two stay like this for a bit, you both getting a bit too excited.

"Let's go to mine. My roommate won't be here for the weekend. You got a car?" Jasper whispers in your ear.

"No, I took the bus."

"Guess you're coming with me. Bummer." Jasper laughs. You laugh as well and go to her car.

As soon as you both get inside Jasper's house, she picks you up and takes you right to her bedroom.

"I'll please you like no other girl can." Jasper practically ripped her shorts off, and yours as well. You kiss her passionately. She makes a shocked grunt sound but soon deepens the kiss.

"Look, I know you just want to fuck me and never see me again, but I wanna take time to appreciate how gorgeous you are."

"Sure." Jasper looks genuinely happy. You smile. She lays on her back next to you. "By the way, these aren't real." Jasper flashes you.

"By the way, you're still beautiful. Look at you, your long hair-"

"That's not real either." Jasper takes the wig and cap off to show silvery blonde shoulder length hair.

"I didn't think you could get more stunning. Your real hair fits you so much better." You kiss her forehead.

"Th-thank you..." Jasper looks at you in disbelief.

"You're welcome. You deserve it. Also your face-"

"Do you know how many surgeries I've had? And why are you being so nice to me?"  
Jasper's tone changes drastically.

"Because you're a beautiful girl and... I'm trans too. Pre everything. I relate to you." You look into her eyes. God, you could get lost in them.

"O-oh, I didn't know that. I thought you were a regular guy, haha." Jasper puts an arm around you. "That just makes you so much hotter." She smirks, copying your words from earlier. You laugh.

"As I was saying, your face is so wonderful, you've got eyes I could get lost in, perfect lips that aren't too big but not small either-"

"Tomorrow I'm getting lip injections again."

"Cancel that appointment. And your strong arms-"

"Why?! I need to make them bigger!" Jasper gets angry at you.

"Because you don't need any plastic surgery to make yourself beautiful. You're beautiful already."

"You can't tell me not to get more surgery! I'll do it if I want to!" Jasper sits up.

"I know that, you don't have to listen to me. I'm just saying you don't need it."

"Yes I do! I need my lips bigger or else no one will think I'm a woman! They think I'm a crossdresser!"

"I think you're a woman, even if you never got any surgery. When you approached me at the club, I was wondering why such a beautiful girl was talking to me." You try to make her feel better.

"You were probably wondering why the hell is this guy with fake tits coming up to me. That's why you were stuttering." Jasper says angrily.

"I stuttered cause I thought you were drop dead gorgeous. I think I know my thoughts better than you." You smile.

"Whatever, I don't wanna deal with you anymore. Get the fuck out of my house." Jasper puts her shorts back on.

"I'm sorry I made you angry..." You put your pants on as well. "I'll leave my number for you just in case."

"Get the hell out." Jasper turns away from you. You nod, scribble your number down, and quickly leave, ready to find a bus stop. You really do like her, but she won't accept your compliments. You go to google maps to find a stop. Great, it's an hour long walk. You sigh and start the walk.

Twenty minutes later, someone calls you. You answer the phone.

"Hello?"

"I- I'm sorry... Please c-come back..." It's Jasper. She sounds like she's been crying.

"It's late, I've been walking for twenty minutes, I'm on the main road, and I don't wanna walk back."

"I- I'll pick you up."

"Okay, I'm on 27th, I'll be in Taco Bell." You hang up. You are low key happy that Jasper called you. But you're tired, hungry, and you don't feel like dealing with anybody. You order some tacos and sit down. When you get them, Jasper calls you again.

"I'm here." is all she says, and she hangs up. You grab the bag and go out to her car.

"I got some tacos for us." You say as you sit next to her. You notice she put her wig back on.

"Oh, I don't eat that. Or much of anything, actually." Jasper laughs in a self deprecating way.

"Please eat, even if it's one bite."

"Shut up."

"Why did you beg for me to come back if you're just gonna be rude?"

"Ugh, why do I have to tell you everything?" Jasper growls.

"You don't. I just want to know why you're so nasty towards me all of a sudden."

"Leave me alone. Just give me a fucking taco and don't talk to me." Jasper snaps. You give her one. The rest of the drive to her house is silent. You both get out and she opens the door.

"What's up, tranny? You got a date?" A girl with blue hair 'greets' you.

"Lapis?! Fuck, I didn't think you'd be back. Please don't talk to me."

"Flight cancelled. Too bad, I was going to enjoy the beautiful Florida Keys, all by myself." Lapis sneers. God, she's a bitch. She turns to you. "You know she's got a dick right?"

"Yeah, so?" You try to get away from her.

"She's not a real woman. I am though, I'll give you my number." Lapis smirks.

"She's as much of a woman as you are a huge bitch. Jasper, let's go back to your car." Jasper stays silent and just follows you back to her car. "I'll drive us to my place. My roommate is a lot better. I'll even give you the clothes my parents give me cause they think I'm a girl." You try to lighten the mood. Jasper stays silent the whole way. You pull up to your house and open the door for your new friend. Then you walk inside.

"(Y/n)! There you are!" Your roommate says. She looks at Jasper warily.

"She's staying the night, and I was going to see if she can stay with us for a bit. She's in a bit of a rough patch." You explain. Jasper's eyes widen.

"Can I? Please?" Jasper asks you.

"Of course. As long as you need." You smile at her. She thanks you and goes into the bathroom. You take your roommate into the living room.  
"Her name is Jasper. She doesn't have a very nice roommate. So I let her stay here. I hope you don't mind."

"You know how I feel about new people..."

"I know, Peridot. But she's nice, even though she isn't right now."

"How did you meet her? And how did you get someone so hot?"

"I was at the bar celebrating and she came up to me. She brought me to her place then her roommate from hell came over." You explain. "I'll get you some art supplies tomorrow to make up for it." Peridot still seems tense. Jasper comes out and sits next to you.

"Jasper, this is Peridot, my roommate. Please be nice to her, and don't be loud around her."

"Why not?" Jasper raises her voice. Peridot gets up and leaves the room. You follow her, giving Jasper a look.

"Leave me alone." Peridot sniffs. You go back to the living room.

"Please, you made her cry. Don't do that."

"Pussy."

"She's not, she has autism. Please have compassion. She hates new people as it is." You say. Jasper grunts and holds you close to her.

"Fine. I'll be quiet. Do you have sweat pants I can use? I don't want her knowing anything."

"Sure. I don't know if they'll fit you though. I'll go to yours tomorrow and get your stuff so you don't have to see Lapis."

"I appreciate it." Jasper gives you a small smile.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> THERES SMUT TREAD CAREFULLY. Jasper talks with Peridot some more.

You wake up the next morning, and Jasper is still sitting on the couch.

"Good morning Jasper!" You smile.

"Morning." Jasper still has her hair and makeup done.

"Did you sleep at all?"

"No." Jasper frowns.

"I'm sorry. That couch pulls out into a bed if you need it to."

"It's not that. Where's Peridot?"

"In her room. Why?" You ask.

"I need to take a shower. And she's not gonna see me like that."

"She won't be out for a bit. You can take a shower. You can use the one upstairs. I'm gonna make breakfast." You say. Jasper goes to use the shower. You make the three of you some eggs and bacon.

****

You three are enjoying breakfast. Well, you and Peridot are. Jasper isn't touching it.

"Hey, Jasper, don't you like it?"

"I don't eat breakfast. I told you this already. I don't like to eat."

"You should eat something. Is there anything you'd like?"

"No. Besides, my appointment is in an hour. I need to freshen up. You said you have clothes, right?" Jasper pokes at her food.

"Yeah, but I really don't think you should go to this appointment. Did you pay for it yet?"

"If I want to go, I will. You got a problem with that? Not everyone has to be like you. If I want surgery, then who are you to tell me I can't? Just because you don't get work done doesn't mean I don't have to." Jasper raises her voice, but quickly lowers it back down.

"I understand, you can do what you want, I'm just telling you what I think. You're already beautiful. And I'm worried about you."

"Peridot, what do I look like?" Jasper asks desperately.

"Um... You look like a woman? What do you want me to say?" Peridot says bluntly.

"Whatever. I don't need your lies. I'm going to get ready for my appointment." Jasper storms away.

"What does she mean 'what do I look like'? She looks like a girl. Am I supposed to say she looks like a man? I just told her what I thought. Is she like, trans or something?" Peridot asks you. Jasper comes back into the room.

"Listen, you don't make accusations like that. So what if I'm trans and I want to look like a woman?"

"Then good for you. I'm glad you're being the person you want to be." Peridot tries to stay calm. Jasper's expression completely softens.

"Oh."

"I have a ton of makeup from my parents who think I should look nicer. You can have it." Peridot says.

"Thanks."

"Any time. And you don't need surgery to be beautiful." Peridot adds. Jasper gives her a little smile.

"Look, I'll cancel my appointment. But that doesn't mean there won't be any more." Jasper goes on her phone to text her doctor. They must be close.

"I appreciate that." You smile at her.

"And it's nice to have someone to talk about girl stuff with. (Y/n) doesn't like it, but now he won't have to deal with it any longer. Except when I complain about my period. Then we complain about that together." Peridot says bravely. Or at least, she thinks it's brave.

"Girl stuff?" Jasper looks curious.

"Yeah, like boys and clothes."

"I like clothes!" You defend yourself.

"But you don't like girl clothes. I need someone to shop in the women's section with and gush about, in your words, 'useless shit, why can't you wear a plain t shirt and be satisfied?' And she can show me how to dress, because that outfit looks so cute on her, and I'm jealous." Peridot holds your arm as she speaks.

"Thank you." Jasper blushes slightly.

"Oh, you're welcome." Peridot gives Jasper a small smile.

"I think all three of us are off today, and I just got paid, so how about we go to the art store and wherever Jasper wants to go?" You say excitedly.

"I did too." Peridot says and lets go of your arm. You two stand up and Peridot goes to her room for a bit.

"Give her time to relax." You say. Jasper hugs you.

"Thank you so much for letting me stay here, you have no idea." Jasper kisses you and you start blushing like crazy. She just laughs and gives you another hug.

"You're beautiful. And I think you should take off the wig." You say.

"You're beautiful. And I can't. It makes me feel more attractive." Jasper admits.

"If you take off that wig, I'll treat you to getting your hair done. And some new clothes." You say.

"Where the hell do you work at?"

"My parents send me money cause they're rich. I volunteer at an animal shelter. Peridot can't work, she gets disability." You explain.

"I work at Hooters, it's the only place that wants me, and I don't want to be a stripper. Actually, they had to hire me or else I'd sue them. I hate that job." Jasper groans. "So many pervs. I took off for the weekend to use my PTO. So that's nice."

"Awwww. This is unrelated, but I want to kiss you, and, well, amongst other things." You giggle.

"If Peridot wasn't here I'd be making out with you. Is it wrong that you make me like, really happy? I haven't felt like this in forever. Almost like I don't need any more surgery." Jasper hugs you.

"I'm glad you feel that way. You make me really happy too. I'm glad you came up to me last night."

"Me too. I was ready for you to dump me after I started grinding on you." Jasper laughs. You hug her tighter.

"Do you know how wet I got when I found out?" You both laugh.

"I want to see for myself." Jasper lowers her voice. Fuck, you really wish Peridot wasn't here. No offense to her, but...

"Mm, I need to take a shower, maybe you might want another one." You smirk.

"I would take you up on that offer, if I was comfortable not wearing makeup around you."

"Well, I still need to take a shower. You're gonna miss out."

"Well, when you get out of the shower I'll be in the room next door." Jasper smirks.

"Can't wait." You both go upstairs.

***

After the shower, you see you got a text from Peridot.

"Be quiet, I don't want to hear sex noises. Take a picture of Jasper so I can use it for research."  
"We won't be loud. And research? Really? She's mine! But I'll see what she says." You get your towel on and flop into bed with Jasper. She kisses your forehead.

"Peridot wants a picture of you for her 'research'. It's funny."

"She's obviously got a crush on me. I don't know, I think she's hot..."

"You do?"

"As soon as I saw her I wanted to bend her over a table and fuck her brains out. I think the same of you, but I feel a deeper attraction to you."

"It's okay, I think she's hot too. Ha, should I tell her what you said?" You laugh.

"Not now. I wanna give you some attention before we discuss anything more. But I'll give her a picture when we're done." Jasper takes her clothes and her wig off.

"It gets in the way." Jasper brushes her hair a bit with her fingers. You lick your lips and play with her a little. Touching, kissing, and finally, you get to the good part.

"Sit on it, it'll feel better for you." Jasper holds it straight so you can sit. It hurts a bit, but you keep going until you're all the way down.

"Ohhhh..."

"Yeah, you like that? Fuck, you're so tight. You move so you're slowly fucking yourself on her.  
"I'm on the pill too."

"Good, I was hoping I'd get to cum inside of you." Jasper's dirty talk really gets you off. You start to bounce on her, quickly picking up speed. Jasper moans when you do so. She takes your hips and basically starts fucking herself with you.

"Mmm, Jasper..." It's not easy to stay quiet.  
"I won't be long. God, you turn me on so much, ahhh..." Jasper really fucks you this time, pounding herself into you.  
"Jasper... Please..."

"Tell me."

"Please, fuck me harder, I need you, please."

"I like boys that beg. Mmmm." Jasper pounds faster, and you think she's going to release soon. She goes faster, making you almost scream as you reach your climax. Jasper isn't far behind, letting out some loud moans before finishing inside of you. You slide off of her and lay down next to her.

"Fuck, that was amazing."

"Very." You say out of breath. You kiss her on the lips before saying you need another shower and a picture for Peridot.

"That's right, let me put this on... Are clothes optional? I want to show her what she's getting tonight. You too, if you want. Did I tell you I'm poly?"

"Nope, but I am too. I got my fill already, pun intended. She's a virgin, be careful with her. And clothes are optional." You smile.

"Good." Jasper puts two of her fingers in a V shape while sticking her tongue out. She also haphazardly attempts to cover herself. You snap a photo and send it to your friend. Oh, she'll love this.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A fun outing with the group. Jasper may be choosing a favorite...

An hour later, Peridot comes back from her room. It's around 12 pm now. She's probably still reeling from that picture, you imagine. You laugh to yourself.

"You ready to go, Peri?" You ask your roommate.

"Is Jasper coming?" Peridot whispers.

"Yeah, why?" You smirk. Peridot looks away. Yup, she's not over that picture just yet. Jasper comes down, wig free, with a bow in her hair. How adorable.

"We out or what?" Jasper checks her phone.

"You look great! Alright, time to hit the bus!"

"I thought I was driving you." Jasper says confused.

"Oh yeah, that's right." You say.

"Then get on the Jasper Bus." Jasper smiles. You three all pile in and you're off to the art store.

You're at the art store, and Peridot is just like a kid in a candy store. She goes right to the aisle she wants to look at, and thinks about what to buy. You think she could spend hours in here. Or not, as she's excitedly showing you things she wants. She explains what everything is in great detail.

"That's cool! Is that what you want?" You smile. Peridot nods.

"You know, since you like art and stuff, maybe I can model for you." Jasper says suggestively. Peridot blushes and looks away.

"Jasper, please." You say. "Here, I'll pay for your stuff, and you can wait outside." You take Peridot's stuff as she runs outside.

"Wait! Where are you going?" Jasper chases after Peridot, which only makes her run faster. After a little while, Jasper catches up to her.

"Hey, don't run off like that. You scared me." Jasper pants. Peridot looks at her like a deer in headlights. "I uh, I wanted to tell you this alone, but me and (y/n) were talking about this and... Well, I think you're really-"

"I'm back! That line sure was long. You two ready to go?" You give Peridot her things. She looks relieved that you're back. Jasper pulls you aside.

"I was trying to tell her she's cute, why'd you have to come back?" Jasper laughs.

"I can't help it. And I should be around when you tell her. She might get antsy." You explain. 

"Interesting, isn't she?" Jasper looks over at Peridot, who is busy looking at her new things.

"I wouldn't have her any other way. Come on, let's go back in the car!" You say the second part aloud. Peridot grabs your arm as you three go to the car.

Next stop is the mall, so Jasper can get some clothes. You also want to go back to her place so you can grab what she needs from there. Jasper seems excited, not nearly as excited as Peridot in the art store, but honestly Peridot has excitement unmatched by anyone.

"I wanna look in here first." Jasper goes into Forever 21. She looks around a bit before stopping at a section for some shorts.

"Honestly, they have such cute clothes here, but they either don't fit me or have some bullshit phrase or emojis on them."

"I-I know right?" Peridot surprisingly says. 

"I saw this sweater I could cut the sleeves off of and wear as a crop top, I thought it was super cute, but I check the back and it says 'wifi password?' on it. Like seriously? I'm a grown ass woman, not a 13 year old." Jasper grunts. Peridot chuckles.

"Maybe you should shop somewhere else then."

"Fuck, maybe you're right. But their shorts are cute as hell." Jasper takes a few pairs. "I'll be back, I'm gonna try these on." Jasper goes to the dressing room. Peridot holds your arm.

"I know, you think she's hot... Do you think she finds you hot?" You smile knowingly.

"She's out of my league." Peridot says. "Like you." She says a lot quieter.

"Me?"

"Forget it."

"No, no, I'm not out of your league at all. I actually think you're really cute. I just wanted to wait till the right time to tell you, but I guess there really is no right time huh?" You blush nervously.

"Are you lying to me?" Peridot starts to get angry.

"No! I honestly like you! And so does Jasper!  We both think you're hot!" You try to explain. Peridot just runs out of the store again. You sigh, knowing better than to chase her. Jasper comes out of the dressing room.

"How do I look? And where's Peridot?" Jasper looks around.

"They're a bit too tight, and I think she's gonna get something to eat." You say.

"I only picked the smaller size so I could show off to her. I'll get the bigger size, maybe a bit more clothes, and can I still get my hair done?"

"Yeah, they just do a terrible job here. I need a cut too. My hair is right down to my eyes." You brush your hair down to show her.

"Awww, keep it." Jasper messes up your hair. You giggle.

"Mayyyybe. I'll pay for these, and then we'll get Peridot. She's probably at the food court. Come to think of it, I'm pretty hungry too." You pay for the clothes and find Peridot. She is in the food court, eating some sushi. You breathe a sigh of relief.

"Hey Peri, sorry to rain on your parade, but we're just going to get some food. Do you want us to sit with you?" You ask. Peridot nods slowly.

"Good, I think I'm in the mood for pizza. Jasper, you stay with her. And don't let her run off!" You say as you walk over to the pizza line. Peridot makes grabby hands at you.

"Hey cutie." Jasper smiles. Peridot looks up, wondering if she's talking on the phone. But instead, she finds Jasper looking right at her.

"(Y/n) isn't here, shouldn't you say that to him?" Peridot says quietly.

"He gave me permission. What are you eating?" Jasper leans over the table. Peridot gulps.

"Um... Sushi. I like it." Peridot looks down.

"Looks interesting. Like you." Jasper smirks. Peridot just blushes. "Shit, I forgot to go to the gym." Jasper leans back.

"Uuugh, I really have to go. Like now. Tell (y/n) I'm going to the gym for a few hours and to take the bus home. See ya later." Jasper grabs her things and walks away. After a few minutes, you come back with pizza.

"Hey, where's Jasper?" You look around.

"She said she's going to the gym for a few hours and to take the bus home."

"I hope she's okay. I got pizza, and I was hoping you'd help me finish it."

"Yay!" Peridot takes a plate and two slices of pizza. "Oh, um, can I tell you something?"

"Sure, tell me anything."

"Well, Jaspercalledmeacutie." Peridot stuffs her mouth with pizza.

"Aww, she likes you! You know I'm poly. Well, so is she!" You eat some pizza.

"Are you two dating?"

"No, not yet, I hope. I'm going to wait for a bit."

"What if she... Tries anything with me?

"What's wrong with that?"

"She can't like me! I'm defective!"

"You're not, and of course she can, and she does! That's a good thing!"

"I don't know if I'd be okay with... A threesome."

"Tell her that, see what she says. Well, ha, don't say threesome. Say a three way relationship. I'd be totally okay if she decides to stick with one person."

"But she'll cheat..."

"It's not like that at all. Well, we'll see. Do you want to talk to her about this now?" You ask. Peridot nods. "Okay, I'll dial her number and take the call first." You dial Jasper's number and wait for her to pick up.

"Hey." Jasper sounds out of breath.

"Hey, sorry to bother you, but Peridot wants to say something."

"Oh really?" Well, I'm on my way back to the mall, exercise isn't working for me today."

"You'd feel better if you eat."

"Yeah, yeah, I'll be there in ten. Let me talk to Peridot." Jasper says, trying to change the subject. You hand the phone over to your friend.

"H-hello?"

"Well hello there."

"Hello, um, I just want to say that... I don't like threeso- three way relationships." Peridot holds your arm. You give her a thumbs up.

"That's okay love. You don't have to like it."

"I'm really sorry..."

"No, no, its perfectly fine. I know you want to date me, and I think I like you enough to still want something with you."

"I have to go." Peridot hangs up. "Did you hear what she said?"

"All of it." You smile. "By the way, she'll be here in ten. She said she wasn't feeling the gym." Peridot groans.

"She can't be here in ten minutes! I still haven't had the time to get over her calling me a cutie, which I'm not, she lied to me, and I feel fat when I eat around her since she's so skinny. I'm jealous of her."

"Don't be, I think she might have a problem, what with her not eating all day and then going to the gym, that's not healthy."

"I hope she's okay..."

"I'm okay, Peri." Peridot looks behind her and lo and behold, there's Jasper. Peridot squeaks. "Nothing is wrong."

"You're supposed to be at the gym!" Peridot hides her face in your shoulder.

"Felt sick, so I came back."

"Did you eat?" You say worriedly.

"I had an apple, okay? You don't have to nitpick about my eating." Jasper snaps.

"Okay, I won't say anything for the rest of the night. I want to get your stuff from your place though."

"Whatever, I'll go in and get it, I know what I need. I'm taking Peridot though."

"W-why me?!"

"Why not you? Come on, let's go." You three walk out and go into Jasper's car, ready to pick up her stuff.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jasper tries something new.

You arrive at Jasper's place, and Jasper curses at the sight of Lapis's blue car. She grabs Peridot's hand and goes inside. You feel a little jealous since Jasper was yours first, but you understand.

****PERIDOT POV****  
Jasper grabs your hand, and something that feels like electricity courses through you. You hate that you like her, and you really hate that she likes you back. You just want to get home and use your new art supplies.

"You again?" A blue haired girl is sitting on the well worn couch. You immediately feel anxious.

"I'm just getting my stuff, leave me the hell alone." Jasper looks upset. You look down.

"Another girl huh? By the way, you still have to help pay for this house."

"I'm leaving."

"You won't leave. You'll come crying back to me saying your girltoy dumped you. Usually lesbians are attracted to girls anyway."

"Lapis, leave me alone." Jasper tries to get to her room, but Lapis gets up and blocks her way.

  
"Is she bi? I mean..."

"Why do you always make fun of me? I bring someone home, and you constantly give me shit for it.  You blatantly insult me and out me so they leave. It's not cute, it's not funny, it's mean." Jasper raises her voice.

  
"Why would anyone want to date you? You have a fake ass tan, you don't eat anything, and you pump yourself with silicone to try and look like a woman. You're disgusting."

"I am a woman, you can't change that, can you please let us go?"

  
"Who are you trying to fool? Your new girlfriend? What happened to that other one?"

  
"This is his roommate."

  
"Oh really?" Lapis circles around you. You just want to cry.  
"Hm. Well, I'm tired of this, I'm going to eat. You have fun with her, _Jonathan_." Lapis walks away.

  
"WHY WOULD YOU CALL ME THAT?! THAT'S NOT MY FUCKING NAME!" Jasper screams. You hold your ears.

  
"Check your birth certificate, you know, the one that says male on it, and then talk to me." Lapis sneers. Jasper storms into her room in tears. She throws clothes into her bag, desperately trying to hurry out. You don't know what to do, but you know you don't want to see her upset.

"Can I hug you?" You say in almost a whisper. Jasper doesn't say anything, but she hugs you tight. To you, that means a lot more than words could ever say. She pulls away after a bit to put more clothes in, grabs a large case, and almost runs out the door and into the car. She turns the ignition on and speeds out of the development.

"Are you alright?" (y/n) asks.  
"No one fucking talk to me." Jasper speeds to your place, almost getting pulled over. She gets her stuff and goes inside. You decide you'll make her something nice. Or at least, you think it's nice. You go into your room and start your project.  
******  
(Y/n) POV

It's the next morning, and Peridot isn't up yet. Jasper is at the kitchen table. She seems to be a bit better, but of course still angry from yesterday.

  
"Good morning!" You try to be cheerful.  
"Morning..." Jasper sounds less angry and more worn out.

  
"Hey, I wanted to talk to you about something..."

  
"I'm sorry, I don't know why, but I really like Peri. Doesn't mean I don't want to be friends with you. Hope you're not mad at me."

  
"Oh okay, I just want to hear you say it personally. I totally understand. I'm not mad at all, actually, I'm happy for you, finding who you want. As long as you're happy, that's all that matters."

"Thank you. Actually, I want to take her out tonight, is there anywhere that would be, like, good for her?"

"No concert, no casino, she's only 18 anyway, bowling alley is good if she brings earplugs."

"Is a picnic okay? Or is that too sappy?"

"That's perfect! Sneak in a sketchbook too, and she's yours." You laugh.

"She's obssessed with that art stuff."

"It's her absolute favorite thing. She has stronger interests in fewer things, like art." You say. "It's cute."

"It sure is. I'll be right back, I'm gonna go to the grocery store."

"I'll send you a text of what she likes, sometimes you have to be specific, she doesn't like certain textures."

"Got it, see you in a bit." Jasper goes out to the car.

****JASPER POV****

You're at the store trying to get a nice picnic set up for Peridot. All while planning your workout, since you'll have to eat so she doesn't worry. You put an apple and some celery in your cart and move on. (Y/n) has sent you a list of foods Peridot can and can't eat.

"Just to let you know, she can't eat chunky peanut butter, but she'll eat creamy with THIN slices. No cold mac and cheese, it has to be fresh and hot. No heating up either. She knows. Anything else is fair game. If you have questions, text me." He texts you. You're jealous of all the stuff she eats. You wish you could... You want to, you're starving. Literally starving, it feels like your body is eating itself. It's not fair, you eat half an apple and half a stick of celery a day. But whatever, your body just hates you or something. Fuck, you hate this. You just want to run out of the store and not look at it ever again.

"Excuse me, miss?" Someone says behind you. They can't be talking to you. You turn your head anyway. A girl looks at you with a little smile on her face.

"I just wanted to say you're beautiful." She says happily. Oh, one of those. They tell you you're beautiful to get something out of you. Or at least, that's what it feels like.

"Thank you..." You say while thinking about how your stomach bulges out too much.

"You're welcome. Don't forget that. By the way, it's okay to eat something." She says. You squint at her.

"I'm sorry, that was out of line to say, I- I just saw you, and saw myself for a bit... I've dealt with anorexia for three years, and it sucks, I just saw you and got that vibe, I apologize." The girl seems genuinely upset. But you can't seem to get mad at her.

"It's okay."

"Im sorry miss..."

"Wait, let me ask you something." Shit, you weren't actually gonna do this, right?

"Sure."

"I wanna eat more, but I can't. What should I do?" You can't believe you said that. You mentally kick yourself.

"Drink one of those breakfast essentials, they're delicious and they have loads of nutrients. And eat a nice meal, maybe some chicken, steak..."

"That's too much."

"Start off with breakfast essentials and what you normally eat, and work your way up from there."

"Thanks."

"I'm glad I could help. Stay strong, and don't give up!" She smiles. You give her a smile and push your cart to the protein aisle. Breakfast essentials? Hm. Apparently it's something you mix into milk, and that's one of your 'no-no' foods. You get almond milk and a box of the variety pack and go back to shopping for Peridot. You end up getting mac and cheese so you can make it (hot!) for her and you have an excuse to drink your stuff. And also stuff to make  peanut butter and banana sandwiches, and two bottles of chocolate milk. You pay for everything and head home, wondering why the hell you want to fatten up like this.

****PERIDOT POV****  
You spent all night working on a painting for Jasper, and you're praying she likes it. She just got home, and you want to give it to her. You help her put groceries away before telling her.

"J-Jasper?" You stutter.

"Yes, Queen?" Jasper smiles at you. You think you might combust right in your own kitchen.

"Ah, um, I made something for you." You hope she doesn't get angry.

"No way! Let me see!" Jasper says excitedly. You hurry to your room to get it. It's a painting of the female symbol with various designs around it. It's very girly. You go back into the kitchen and hope Jasper doesn't hate it.

"Oh my God!!! Look at this!!!" Jasper is definitely not mad at you for making such shitty art. "This is beautiful! I love all the shades of pink!" Jasper can't stop smiling. She gives you a big hug.

"Thank you." You smile back.

"(Y/n), look what Peri gave me!" Jasper shows (y/n) your picture.

"That's cute!" He says. You feel better now. "I'm putting this in my room." She runs upstairs and runs back. "Look, I need your help. Both of you. I want to get fat, so I got this milk stuff, and I need you guys to like... Help me. I think I'll go to the doctor, I don't know what the fuck is wrong with me, but I'm sick all the time. I don't want to live like this."

  
"You won't be getting fat, you'll be getting healthy. I'm glad you want to be healthy." (y/n) looks happy.

"I don't know..."

"I'll drink it with you if that helps." You pipe up.

  
"That really means a lot. Better start now, I guess. Just, get out, I don't want you watching me." You and (y/n) go into the living room while Jasper makes her drink. Soon, she comes out with two small glasses.

  
"Peridot, come with me..." You nod and follow her upstairs. You both sit on her bed. "I- I don't know if I can do this.." You lean on her arm.

"You're very strong by just sitting here with a glass of milk. You wouldn't even think of this yesterday." You take a sip of it. "It's good. Tastes like vanilla." Jasper just stares at her cup. She's shaking, almost to the point of spilling the contents.

"I can't!" Jasper says angrily.

  
"You can do this! Look, I'll do it with you. You ready?  
"I guess..."

  
"Alright, three, two, one... Go!" You take a big sip. Jasper takes a smaller one, but surprisingly it's not that small.

"Great job!" You pat her back.

"Are you fucking teasing me?! You did that so easily, now you're making me look dumb. Do you know how hard that was?! Of course you don't." Jasper pushes you off of her. You want to cry.

"No! I'm not! You drank it! And that's more than you did yesterday. I understand it was hard for you." You take a deep breath. Jasper lays down on the bed. You lay next to her.

"Get the hell out of here, I don't need your bitchy comments." Jasper flips you off. You run out of the room in tears.

****(y/n) POV****  
"Hey, what's wrong?" You're concerned for your friend. She points up the stairs.

"Jasper? Was she mean to you?" You ask. Peridot nods and cries into your side.

"Did she drink her milk stuff?" You cautiously give Peridot a hug. She nods.

"She got mad... Said... Made her look dumb. I'm sorry..." Peridot sniffs and sits on the couch.

"Jasper's just going through some things right now. It's not your fault. She's not feeling too well right now." You explain. Peridot cries for a few more minutes, then she stops. Turns out she fell asleep. You smile.

An hour later, she wakes up. Jasper went to get some things, and you're making peanut butter and banana sandwiches for tonight since Jasper doesn't "even wanna look at food for the rest of the day.". You know how Peri likes her sandwiches a lot better than she does, so you're happy. Jasper wants to have this date at 7, and it's 3:30 now. So you have time. Peridot goes into her room. You send her a text saying to be ready at 7.

****JASPER POV***  
Shit, you feel really bad about yelling at Peridot. But she made fun of you trying to better yourself! Who wouldn't get mad at that? Whatever, you're getting your nails done to get your mind off of that. Peridot seems to like the color green, so you choose a blue green color. Even though you're mad at her right now. You're going to get hair extensions too, since you're getting paid tomorrow.

****

  
****PERIDOT POV****  
It's 6 pm, and you're getting ready for your date with Jasper. You couldn't be more nervous. You think you've found the right dress to wear, but would Jasper like it? You groan. Whatever, you'll wear this green floral dress hoping she'll like that. If she doesn't, at least you think it's pretty. You also put on some makeup to spice things up a bit. You just hope this date goes well.

 


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jasper's emotions get out of hand.

****PERIDOT POV****

When you see Jasper again, it's 6:45. And, to say the least, she looks drop dead gorgeous. She has long hair that goes down to the small of her back, a black and white pencil dress that hugs her curves perfectly, shiny red stilettos, and don't even get you started on her makeup. You're a sucker for thick eyebrows, and Jasper's definitely struck a chord with you. Her eye makeup looked super seductive, and her red lipstick on those big kissable lips just made the whole outfit pop. 

"You look... Great." You try to get out.

"I know, I look like a drag queen. I don't want to hear it." Jasper must still be upset about earlier. "Can't I try to look nice for once without your bitchy comments? Get in the car, we're leaving." Jasper goes to get something while you go into the car. Why is she being so mean to you? She was nice earlier, she called you a queen, which you loved. But now she's rude! You hope she feels better soon. You text (y/n) that Jasper is being mean. You go into the car and find flowers and a book in the passenger seat. The book said "Strathmore" on the front... It's a sketchbook! Is this for you? It can't be. You also find a small case of Derwent pencils. Yours are running out and you forgot to buy some at the art store. Jasper puts a bag in the trunk and gets in the car.

"That's for you." Jasper says without looking at you.

"T-thank you, I needed these..." You smile. "And I love the flowers." 

"Yeah, yeah, enough of that." Jasper snaps at you. "We're just gonna go to some stupid park, okay? I'm not buying anything more for you."

"I don't want anything more. Well, I want you to be happy..." You look down. You're really trying hard not to cry. You just want her to be nice to you!

"Are you gonna fucking cry now? Pathetic. I bought you shit and you still cry like the little bitch you are! What's the matter with you?!" Jasper yells. You start bawling, not caring if she's there.  
"And then you go around telling me I look great, bitch why would you lie to me?! I spent two hours on my makeup to try and look good for you, and you lie to my fucking face!! I even got my nails done a green color for you!"

"Why are you being so mean?!" You cry.

"Cause you disrespected me to my face!" Jasper yells again. You cry for the rest of the way while Jasper just mutters some curses at drivers. You arrive at the park and you both get out of the car. Jasper gets the bag and slams the trunk down, making you flinch. You follow her to a picnic table. You sit down across from Jasper. She gives you a sandwich and looks like she's considering one for herself, but decides against.

"Go on, you fat fuck, eat it." Jasper snarls. You push the sandwich away. You sign the words "I'm not hungry.", now feeling unable to speak.

"You're not fucking deaf, say it." Jasper glares at you. You text (y/n) to try and get him to help you.

"Let's go, I'm sick of you. Get in the back." Jasper puts the sandwich in the big bag and gets back into her car. You sit in the back seat. The rest of the car ride is silent. When you get home, you grab your things and run inside. A very worried (y/n) is watching tv.

"You alright Peri?" He asks you. You sign "Jasper was very very mean." 

"How?" You ask.

****(y/n) POV****

Peridot is signing. It must be really bad. When you found out she uses sign language instead of talking when she's upset, you went to take classes on it. You're pretty fluent in it. She signs "She called me mean names and was very loud. She got me flowers and art stuff, but she was loud and mean.". Just then, a very angry Jasper barges in.

"She's so ungrateful, I fucking bought things for her, took her out, and she just cries the whole time! And then she goes and uses sign language on me like I'm deaf or some shit."

"Jasper, calm down. Take deep breaths." You say quietly. Jasper sits on the couch and breathes deeply. "Peridot was crying because she said you were mean to her, and she signs because when she's upset, she literally cannot talk. That's just how she is. And I told you not to be loud around her."

"Why do I always like the crazy girls?" Jasper mutters.

"She's not crazy, just different." You say. Jasper angrily sighs. You wonder why she's so angry. "You can tell us why you're upset if you want." Jasper is silent for a bit.

"She lied to me. She said I looked great, just like Lapis did. I was waiting for her to laugh and call me a drag queen, but now that I think about it, she never said that."

"Lapis is one of the worst human beings on the planet. Don't ever listen to her."

"She deadnames me in front of Peridot, who the fuck does that? And she constantly says I'll never be a real woman, cause of what parts I was born with." Jasper says. Oh, you understand completely.

"I totally understand. What do you feel like inside?"

"Shit." Jasper deadpans.

"We gotta build your self esteem. But you feel like a woman, right?"

"Yeah."

"Then that's what you are. You are a real woman. I want you to keep playing that in your head instead of the lies Lapis tells you. You are a real woman, no matter what parts you have. Are you taking hormones?"

"Yeah, have been for two years."

"Good for you, I wanna go on T, but I don't think I'm ready for it. Such big changes."

"You're still a man in my eyes."

"I appreciate that. And I got my period today, so that helps."

"That really sucks. I heard it hurts."

"Oh it does." You say. Peridot signs "I think mine is coming soon. And Jasper's lucky, she doesn't have a period."

"Yeah, usually yours comes a few days after mine. And yeah, but I'm sure she would like to have one if it meant having the same parts as you." You whisper the second part to her. She shrugs her shoulders. "Jasper, can you sincerely apologize to Peridot? You've really hurt her feelings." Peridot looks at Jasper.

"I'm sorry for getting upset when you lied to me." Jasper doesn't look up.

"She didn't lie to you, none of us would. She thought you looked nice, which you do, and she said it. It wasn't mean spirited at all. She honestly thought you look good."

"Yeah but then she cries on the whole trip."

"Because you yelled at her and were rude." Peridot signs "She got mad when I liked what she bought me."

"Peridot said you got mad at her when she liked the stuff you got her."

"She wanted more from me! That's why!" Jasper looks back up. Peridot signs "I just said I wanted you to be happy and then you yelled at me."

"She said she wanted you to be happy and you yell at her?" You are really trying to not be upset.

"Well, that's still something." Jasper says. Peridot gets up and sits with Jasper. Jasper looks at her surprised.

"Peridot, why are you sitting with her?" You ask. She signs "Because I like her even if she yells. She is beautiful and calls me nice names sometimes."

"Aw, she likes you even if you yell." You chuckle. Peridot speaks up.

"Jasper, please be nice to me." She says. She sounds sad. Jasper looks at her with an unreadable expression. 

"I'm sorry..." Jasper says quietly. "(Y/n), you got money?"

"For what?"

"I'll text you, I gotta make a call." Jasper goes upstairs. She quickly sends you a text. Ohhh. Yeah, you'll give her some.

"Jasper..."

"She'll come back. She just has to do something." You say. And in a few minutes, she does come back.

"I almost got fired, but I took off tomorrow. Me and Peridot are having Redemption Day." Jasper has a little smile.

"No!" Peridot says, obviously angry.

"Look, I promise I won't be mean to you. I'm sorry."

"You called me fat. You yelled at me."

"I know I did, that's why I made this impromptu plan to spend the day with you tomorrow."

"I know, and I feel like shit about it. I don't mean to be so angry, I don't know why I get like that."  
"You want me to leave you two alone for a bit?" You ask.

"Please." Jasper says. You go upstairs.

****PERIDOT POV****  
You look at Jasper, terrified. She gives you a hug.

"Fuck, I'm so sorry." Jasper seems upset, almost ready to cry. For a split second you think about using her words against her. You decide against. "I can't cry, I have all this makeup on." Jasper tries to laugh. You crack a smile.

"I honestly think you look beautiful." You say cautiously.

"Thank you." Jasper says. It sounded like that was hard for her to say.

"Not everyone is out to get you."  
"Seems like it."

"They're not. I'm not."

"This is unrelated, but do you mind if I take my bra off? I picked out one that's way too uncomfortable." Jasper asks you. Your cheeks turn red.

"S-sure." You stutter. Why in front of you?!

"Thanks love." Jasper unhooks her bra and takes it off. Now she's nice again. "I remember when I got my first boob job, I was so excited to wear a bra. Now they just suck."

"Same here, but when I was eleven, um, they started growing in. I was excited too."

"Yeah, yours are really nice." Jasper smiles. Wait, what? Yours are a lot smaller than Jasper's, she is pretty large, but not too big. You stare at them more than you care to admit. Wondering what they felt like, do they feel like real ones? You would love to suck on her... "Earth to Peridot." Jasper has a knowing look on her face. Shit.

"Sorry..." You say, embarrassed.

"Not gonna lie, I was thinking about you." Jasper cuddles you. You feel like you're on fire.

"Oh."

"Kissing you, touching you... Stuff like that."

"You wanna kiss me?!"

"Sure do." Jasper blushes. You look away. She chuckles and kisses the top of your head.

"Oh, um... You're beautiful, you're hot, you can't want to kiss me. I'm ugly and weird."

"Look baby, you're not ugly. What you said about me, is what I think of you. I'm ugly and weird." Jasper laughs.

"If you are, I don't see it." You look up at her.

"You're cute." Jasper looks into your eyes. They're a light blue color, like the sky. You could get lost in them.

"Can I sit on your lap? The people I read about do that."

"Um... I don't really want you to."

"That's okay."

"But now I'm interested in these people you read about." Jasper plays with your hair. You gulp.

"They're not that exciting."

"Doubt it." Jasper puts her hand under your chin, making both of your faces at the same height. You're not gonna lie, you really like this. A little too much, since you can feel a certain sensation 'down there'. But you're not telling her that. Jasper takes some time to just look at you, while you do the same to her. Then it happens, she presses her lips onto yours. What feels like electricity courses through your body. Her lips are softer than you expected, and that just makes everything better. Jasper pulls away to take a breath.

"That was nice." You blush.

"It was. It was really nice." Jasper sits you on her leg.

"I thought you didn't want me on your lap."  
"This isn't my lap. Trust me, you don't wanna go there."

"You know, I'm fine with that. A little too fine actually." You get embarrassed. This whole time you were fighting a losing battle between your eyes and Jasper's crotch. You really wanted to sit on it, maybe feel her grind on you... 

"Are you staring at my dick?" Jasper has an unreadable expression. Shitshitshit, this is bad.

"N-no! Of course not..." 

"I know it's weird to you, but you don't have to make it obvious."

"It's not that, I just um... Like it..." You whisper the second part.

"You like it?"

"Yes..." You feel humiliated.

"Well I guess that makes it even, all this time I was staring at your tits." Jasper chuckles. You get even more humiliated. "You know Peri, I think about you all the time now."

"I think about you like that too."

"Fuck it, get on my lap." Jasper says abruptly.

"I'll... Make your dress dirty."

"Are you wet?" Jasper says lowly.

"Maybe..." You blush more.

"That's fucking hot." Jasper puts you on her lap like a doll. You can feel how 'excited' she is, and that just makes you want her more. "You're fucking hot." Jasper kisses you again, this time it feels better. She licks your lips, and you know she wants her tongue in your mouth, so you open it a bit more. But you don't feel too comfortable doing anything else. You pull away first.

"Jasper, I don't want to go any further with you right now. Please don't be mad. I know I'm... You know, but I don't want to go there." You tense up.

"That's perfectly fine love. Truth is... I don't want to go there right now either." Jasper admits.

"Please don't yell at me..."

"I won't. I'm sorry that I did."

"Can we stop? But I want to... Cuddle." You blush.

"Of course. You're still fucking hot though." Jasper grins. "And remember, tomorrow is your day. We're going to be together all day. And I'm not going to yell once." Jasper smiles. "Shit, I forgot to go to the gym today. Oh well." Jasper yawns. This is new.   
"I'm trying to eat more and go to the gym less. I'm sick of this disorder consuming me."

"I'm glad you're bettering yourself."

"Thanks sweetheart." Jasper picks you up bridal style. You smile and start to fall asleep.


End file.
